Top 40 funniest birthday sayings for women

Welcome to our humorous tour of the top 40 funniest birthday sayings for women! Whether you're looking for a charming message for a card, want to spice up your witty birthday greeting on social media, are looking for a snappy saying for a quick WhatsApp message or are just looking for a hearty laugh - you've come to the right place. We've put together a fine selection of sayings that range from gently smirking to uproariously funny. These sayings are perfect for celebrating the special women in your life - be it your best friend, sister, mother or even yourself - and putting a smile on their face. So, get comfy, grab a cup of coffee (or a glass of wine) and let's dive into the world of funniness that every woman deserves on her special day.

10 short & funny birthday wishes for women

1. Happy hatching day! Isn't it crazy? You're hitting 35 today (or whatever age fits). But honestly, you don't look a day over 34!
2. My darling, if you can blow away that many candles, then you've definitely got plenty of puff left for the future.
3. A real girlfriend is like a first-class bra: hard to find, always supportive, comfortable, motivating and always close to your heart.
4. The recipe for looking young? Just spend time with people who have a few more years under their belt!
5. Good luck on your birthday! Remember: Wrinkles are like chocolate - the more, the happier!
6. Happy birthday! Remember, age is just a number, and we all look younger in the dark!
7. Happy birthday! Don't forget to stay young at heart - and let the others take care of the details.
8. Happy birthday! Remember: Women don't age, they just get more sophisticated and charming. You are well on your way to perfection!
9. Only the best for your birthday - more wine, more chocolate, more laughter. Because as we know: These are the true fountains of youth!
10. At 50, you finally have the noble task of catching up on all the nonsense you didn't have the money for at 20.

10 slightly longer funny birthday greetings for women

1. Happy birthday! Always remember: with each new year, not only does wisdom grow, but also our degree of freedom to care less about what others think. So live, laugh and be louder than ever!
2. Happy birthday! They say with age comes wisdom, but I think we prove every year that we are the exception to that rule. Here's to another year of unwise decisions and fits of laughter!
3. Happy birthday to you! Remember, age is irrelevant unless you're a bottle of wine or a cheese - and even then, you're only getting better and more valuable. So let's toast to your exquisite age!
4. For your birthday, may all your dreams come true - except the one with the five-kilo chocolate cake. We want your other clothes to fit too! All the best!
5. Happy Birthday! A wise person once said: 'Life is short, eat the cake'. So forget the calories, don't worry about your waistline and enjoy your day to the full - with a double portion of cake!
6. Happy birthday to you! If someone says you're getting better every year, believe them! It's like fine wine or a moldy cheese - only finer, nobler and definitely more expensive to maintain. So let's toast to the fact that you're not getting older, just more 'vintage' and 'limited edition'. Here's to another year of unforgettable 'I can't believe we did that' moments!
7. Happy birthday to you! Remember, age is just a number, but a high score in the game of life means you're winning! So celebrate your personal high score today with more cake, more laughs and maybe a few questionable decisions that we'll chalk up to 'experience' tomorrow.
8. For your birthday, I wish you that all your wrinkles come from deep laugh lines and not from worry. May your day be as bright as your highlighter palette and your year full of moments of happiness that come as unexpectedly as a sale at your favorite store!
9. Congratulations to you! Remember: With each passing year, you are like a magnificent tree that continues to grow in height and width. So let's celebrate your 'rings' today - and by 'rings', of course, I mean the rounds at the buffet and the glasses we'll raise to you!
10. Happy birthday to you! Now that you've reached the perfect age to know what you want and how to get it, it's time to take on the world - or at least the cake. Remember, every bite is a piece of happiness, so count the moments, not the calories!

10 longer funny birthday sayings for women

1. Happy birthday! May your day be as memorable as the moment you tried doing yoga online for the first time and realized that relaxation can come in the form of chocolate in front of the screen. Here's to another year of laughter, indulgence and the occasional 'why not?
2. Happy birthday to you! May you shine so bright today that even the sun wants to take a leaf out of your book. And if anyone says 'age before beauty', just smile, because you've got both in the bag! Here's to a year where you say 'yes' to desserts as often as you say 'yes' to new adventures, and may your laughter be as infectious as your fashion sense."
3. Happy birthday to you! Remember that each new year of life is like a new shoebox - you never know what you're going to get, but you can be sure it's going to be exciting! And if an extra wrinkle appears on your face, remember: these are just the footprints of your smile. Here's to a year full of happiness, health and shoes that are as comfortable as they look beautiful!
4. Happy Birthday! Today we celebrate not only your date of birth, but also your ability to take life as it comes - with a glass of wine in one hand and chocolate in the other. May you continue to find as many reasons to laugh as there are excuses to skip gym sessions. Here's to another year of joy, fun and 'I didn't see that coming' moments!
5. Happy birthday to you! A year older, a year wiser, but thankfully no less playful. May your new year be as colorful as your favorite nail polish collection and as sparkling as your favorite champagne. And if you ever think about not counting your birthdays anymore, remember: Numbers are like ex-partners - they don't matter as long as you're having fun!
6. Happy birthday! In a universe that's constantly expanding, keeping up with your charm, wit and beaming smile is your superpower. Let's celebrate your existence today, as exuberant and brilliant as fireworks lighting up the night sky. Here's to a year of laughs so hard they count as ab workouts and sweet moments that will override any calorie counter.
7. My dearest friend: sure, I counted how many candles are on your cake today - but shhh, I'm a grave of secrets. All the best for your birthday!
8. Happy birthday to you! Remember when we were young and thought we would have everything in life figured out by that age? Ah, how naive! Now we know that the only thing we really have figured out is that chocolate is a good idea at any time of day and that true friendship is about forgetting together what you actually wanted to tell.
9. I would like to give you a piece of advice for your birthday: When life gives you lemons, make lemonade - or even better, grab some tequila and salt! You're at a wonderful age where 'life-experienced decisions' can be used as an excuse for almost anything. Use it wisely!
10. Happy birthday to you! You've reached that glorious age where every compliment you receive should be celebrated like a small victory against gravity. Remember: every wrinkle is a sign of a laugh, and every strand of gray hair is proof of life experience gained.

10 really cheeky birthday greetings for women

1. I'm really happy for you: I feel like I've just hatched every day next to you!
2. Happy birthday! Remember, at your age it's not the speed with which you blow out the candles that counts, but the skill with which you conceal your wrinkles!
3. For your birthday, I hope it takes you as long to grow old as it takes to believe all your 'I'm 29' stories!
4. Congratulations! You've reached the perfect age to justify all your decisions with 'I'm old enough to know better' and 'I'm young enough to do it anyway'!
5. Happy birthday to you! May your coffee be strong and your anti-wrinkle cream stronger!
6. Congratulations! You're now at the age where 'you look tired' is considered a serious insult.
7. For your birthday: you're not older, you're just retro - and retro is totally in right now!
8. Happy birthday! Now that you're officially older, you can finally start swearing at people for no reason. Welcome to the club!
9. Congratulations! You're now at the age where 'I had a good night' means you slept well.
10. Happy birthday to you! May your birthday be as memorable as the moment you first said 'the youth of today'.

5 tips on how to get your birthday greetings across even better

1. Personal touch: Make your birthday greetings personal. Use inside jokes, shared memories or something that is specifically tailored to the person. This shows that you've put some thought into it.
2. Timing is everything: Try to deliver your birthday sayings on time. A birthday greeting in the morning can set the tone for a happy day. Running late? Better late than never - send it anyway!
3. Choose the right medium: Think about how the recipient prefers to communicate. Some are happy to receive a handwritten card, others a message or a phone call. If you know what the birthday boy or girl likes, you're on the right track. In this day and age, a phone call is almost a rarity: so call!
4. Be authentic: Be true to yourself in what you say. Nothing is better received than honest and heartfelt words that really come from you.
5. Creativity counts: A little creativity can't hurt. Whether it's a short poem, a funny meme or a short video - creatively delivered greetings are remembered.